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Sardar Ji once again......  

Posted by Khatri The King

Sardar declares:
.... . . I will never marry in my life &. . .
.. . . I'll give same advice to my children also. . . ..

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A donkey kicked a Sardar & ran away
Sardar ran to catch the donkey.
He saw a zebra & started beating it & said 'SALA Tracksuit
pahan ke dhoka de raha hai'.



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Sardar: Darling, years ago u had a figure like Coke bottle.
Jeeto: Yes darling I still do, only differnece is earlier it
was 300ml now it's 2 ltr.


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Santa went to Mysore palace.
Tourist guide - Santaji plz dont sit there, its Tipu sultan's chair
Santa - Oye dont worry yaar i'll get up when he comes.!!..


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Sardar wanted to make a STD call to punjab,
He wanted to save money so what did he do?
Simple, he went to punjab and made a local call..


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One tourist from U.S.A.asked to Sardar: Any great man born in this village?
Sardar: No sir, only small babies!!!


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Teacher: A for?
Sardar: Apple
Teacher: Jor se bolo?
Sardar: Jay mata di.



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2 sardars were fighting after exam.
Sir: Y r u fighting?
1st Sardar: This fool left the answer sheet blank,
Sir: So what?
1st Sardar: Even i did the same thing, now teacher will think that we both copied.


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Sardar 1: I'm very kanjoos, I went 2 honeymoon alone & saved 1/2 money.
Sardar 2: You R nothing I saved all my money, my friend was going & I sent my wife with him.


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Sardar is in a dissection class of cockroach. He cuts its 1 leg, and says, "chal", it walks.
He cuts 2nd and 3rd legs and said, "chal" , it walks.
He cuts all the legs and said, "chal....." Finally he wrote the conclusion.......
..... "after all the legs of a cockroach are cut - it becomes deaf......"


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A Tamilian call up sardar and asks " tamil therima??"
Sardar got mad, angrily replied.... "Hindi tera baap!!!"


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2 sardarjis looking at Egyptian mummy.
Sar 1 : Look so many bandages, pakka lorry accident case.
Sar 2 : Aaho, lorry number is also written...BC 1760!!!....


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A sardar on an interview 4 da post detective.
Interviewer : who killed Gandhi?
Sardar : Thank u sir 4 giving me d job, I will start investigating.......


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A scene from Kohn Benega Crorepati....
Amitabh : In which state Cauvery flows?
Sardar : Liquid state.....
Audience clapped.. Amitabh stunned, looks behind, ALL WERE SARDARS......


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Boss: Where were you born?
Sardar: India ...
Boss: which part?
Sardar: What 'which part'? Whole body was born in India


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2 sardar were fixing a bomb in a car.
Sardar 1: What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.
Sardar 2: Dont worry, I have one more.


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Sardar: What is the name of your car?
Lady: I forgot the name, but is starts with 'T'.
Sardar: Oh, what a strange car, starts with Tea. All cars that I know start with petrol.



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Sardar joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the computer. Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening.
Sardar: Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright.



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Museum Administrator: That's a 500-year-old statue u've broken..
Sardar: Thanks God! I thought it was a new one.

At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O God! I have lost my hand, oh!
Sardar: Control yourself. Don't cry. See that man. He has lost his head. Is he crying?


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Sardar: U cheated me.
Shopkeeper: No, I sold a good radio to u.
Sardar: Radio label shows Made in Japan but radio says this is 'All India Radio! '

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NOW THE LAST TWO ULTIMATE:
In an interview, Interviewer: How does an electric motor run?
Sardar: Dhhuuuurrrrrrrrrr. .....
Inteviewer shouts: Stop it.
Sardar: Dhhuurrrr dhup dhup dhup....

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Tourist: Whose skeleton is that?
Sardar: An old king's skeleton.
Tourist: Who's that smaller skeleton next to it?
Sardar: That was same king's skeleton when he was a child.

Heights ( funny )  

Posted by Khatri The King


1. What is height of Fashion?

Dhoti with a zip

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2. What is height of Secrecy?

Offering blank visiting cards.

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3. What is height of Activelaziness?

Asking for a lift to house while on a morning walk.

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4. What is height of Laziness?

Adopting a child.

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5. What is height of Craziness?

Getting a blank paper Xeroxed.

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6. What is height of Forgetfulness?

Seeing the mirror and trying to recollect when you Saw Him / her Last.

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7. What is height of Stupidity?

A man looking through a keyhole of a glass door.

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8. What is height of Honesty?

A pregnant woman taking one and a half ticket.

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9. What is height of Suicide?

A dwarf jumping from the footpath on the road.

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10. What is height of De-hydration?

A cow giving milk powder.

SANTA BANTA Fresh Jokes  

Posted by Khatri The King

Interviewer: What is skeleton?
Santa: Skeleton is a person who started dieting but forgot to stop it....!!!

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जेलर : तुम्हे कल सुबह 5 बजे फाँसी दी जायेगी !
सरदार : हा हा हा हा !
जेलर : क्यों हँस रहे हो ?
सरदार : मैं तो उठता ही सुबह 9 बजे हूँ !

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Teacher: Translate - बाज़ार में गोलियां चल रही हैं !
संता : The Tablets are walking in the market..

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Santa's girfriend: मेरी माँ आपको बहुत पसंद करती है !
Santa, after a deep thought: कुछ भी हो जाये , शादी तो मैं तुझसे ही करूँगा !

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Shopkeeper: This sweater's made of pure virgin wool sir.
Santa: You see I am not interested in the morals of the sheep. Just tell me, will it keep me warm?


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संता : Why has the Govt. fixed voting age 18yrs & marriage age 21yrs?
बंता : Govt. को पता है की देश संभालना आसान है , लेकिन बीवी को नहीं .

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संता बड़ा दुखी था , किसी ने पूछा इतनी टेंशन में क्यों हो ?
संता : एक दोस्त को 3 लाख प्लास्टिक सर्जरी के लिए दिए थे, अब उसे पहचान नहीं पा रहा हूँ !


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Postman: I have to come 5 miles to deliver u this packet.
Santa: Why did u come so far. Instead U could have posted it.

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Why did Santa sleep with a scale?
Because he wanted to measure how long he has Slept.

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ड्राईवर : सर जी , पेट्रोल ख़तम हो गया , गाडी आगे नहीं जा सकती .
बंता :-चलो फिर , वापिस ले चलो ..

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संता : वो देख तेरी बीवी को सांप काट रहा है !
बंता : अरे टेंशन मत ले , जहर भरवाने आया होगा ...

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Santa bought a car on loan.... He didn't pay the dues, the bank took away his car.
Santa: If I knew this, I'd have taken a loan for my marriage also!